Ask Zane Anything
You share a first name with the father of the Western novel, Zane Grey. But you don't have a western omelette on the menu. Is that not a tragic situation crying out for rectification?
- asked by Mark
Oh Mark! How I have longed for this question. Longed and longed and longed for such a... you get the idea. Zane is a Muslim name. I love being a Jew with a Muslim name. I was named for Shnaer Zalman Duchman my father's grandfather and by all accounts a righteous dude. In my family, they give you a Jewish name in honour of a dead relative and then an English name for daily use. Zane Cohen is a childhood friend of my mother's and I'm quite certain that he is source of my name. I'm also pretty sure that his parents may have learned that name from the famed Western writer and marlin fisherman: Zane Grey. The problem or challenge with the Western Omelette as an homage to Zane Grey is that it contains ham. You can't call it a Western if it ain't got no ham. And if you know anything about me it's that I'm a stickler for authenticity (as well as snappy dresser). So, my dear Mark, until I open "Zane's Place for Pork"... wait a second...
Thank you from Zane


Zane is not responsible for screwing up your life if you take his relationship advice. Please take all answers with a light heart and an open mind. Zane is not a psychologist, biologist, dermatologist, botanist, or specialist of any kind in anything other than Deli. Even then, he's not perfect, but strives to be. Zane takes no responsibility if you take his advice seriously, because, well, he doesn't take his own advice seriously.